Im sure most of us can relate to this! LOL.
I am not a patient person, let alone a patient person. But patience can be developed over time — it’s a habit, and like any other habit, it just takes some focus.
Here are some tips:
1. Count to 10. This one really works. When you feel yourself getting frustrated or angry, stop. Count slowly to 10 (you can do this in your head). When you’re done, most of the initial impulse to yell will go away. Alternatively, if you count out loud to 10, your kids will learn quickly that this is a good sign to run away.
2. Deep breaths. This works very well in conjunction with the above tip. Count to 10, and then take three slow, deep breaths. Feel the frustration draining out of you with each breath.
3. Tally marks. One of the most effective and important methods for controlling an impulse — these worrisome urges that we have difficulty controlling — is to become more aware of it. And to do that, you should carry around a little pencil and paper all day, and each time you feel the impulse (in this case, to react with anger), mark down a tally. This is an extremely important first step. Once you become aware of your impulses, you can work out an alternative reaction.
4. Pretend someone’s watching. I forgot where I read this tip (a couple places, I think), but it’s effective. Pretend you have an audience. You’re less likely to overreact with your child if someone’s there watching your every move.
What would mom do? My mom is one of the most patient people I know (although she’s human like the rest of us). So when I find my ire rising, I think … “How would my mom handle this?” And using this role model, I begin to change my behavior to something more positive. You can use any role model you want — not necessarily my mom.
I love Zen Habits! I get a LOT of tips there. You can read more tips here.