Big changes are coming to our household and our married life in the next two days. IF it comes to fruition, I’ll sure be blogging about it, and you sure will notice it too :). I forgot to mention househelp has arrived last week - thank God. She’s turning 18 two days after Matthew’s 6th birthday, living in the province in a house without electricity since she was born, and does laundry everyday for only 100pesos for 8hrs of manual laundrywork. She hasnt stepped into high school, and has an alcoholic wife-beater of a father. Grim? That’s when you actually appreciate the beauty and the Hand of God in everything and everyone. She remains optimistic, cheerful — that girl has a LOT of potential. She dotes on Martha (she has been working since she was fourteen — depressing, aint it?, and been caring for her nieces at home). She has patience (at least for now) with Matthew. I hope and pray she lasts. We really really need her so Edil can work. We risked a major financial move this week that we BOTH need to work or else we are dead.

I cant believe I will ever say this but yes, Im actually feeling the crisis our country is facing - economically, politically, environmentally. It scares the hell out of me as a parent. I finally understand the reasons why my parents were so worried about us when we could not care less. Case in point: I work graveyard shifts at 9.30PM. Since money is tight and we are pinching pennies, I dont take the cab anymore. I ride the jeep and take the bus, almost 3 times a week (weekends I take a cab since it’s family day so Im always running a little bit late). I see little boys, the same age as Matthew’s, on the streets, begging, smelling and sniffing rugby, or worse, heckling passersby for food or money. I see their parents, with newborn babies, on sidewalks, with only cardboards for a home. I know it maybe a common sight in some places but there was one instance that floored me: A kid no more than 12 I think was sniffing rugby right beside his Dad, or someone old enough to tell him NO. And you know what? Less than 500 meters away were cops. COPS! It depresses me so much to the point that Im actually scared for them already — and the hundreds of homeless kids (For those who dont know, inhaling rugby or gases take out hunger pangs, and induce a state of “feeling high” — their escape, obviously).

And then I go home, with food on the table, it aint much sometimes - sometimes, there arent any prepared. But there will always be something, someone, who will deliver, fresh bread from our next door neighbor - my grandmas, or my Mommy coming home with food from Amadeo. I go to sleep, on a bed, it aint much, but I can turn on the A/C when it hits a hundred degrees outside. I drink clean water. I can take a bath in a toilet — it aint has a tub, but it is sanitary. I eat, three times a day, sometimes I dont like the food, but I dont have to beg for them, dont have to go from one lunch to the next wondering where I will get the next meal. I dont have the money I want for the things I work for. But God always gives me what I need. Always. Without Fail.

So the next time you sip a Coke, or enjoy your fries, think about how lucky you are that you have the money to buy them instead of griping about how you dont get to fine dine anymore. Outside the window, homeless kids will be waiting for your leftover food.

Sad, aint it?
What will you do? Me, I will always be grateful for what I have, now.

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